I don't know how else to tell you that I am no good at this.
At life- at love- at moving on.
My first instinct was to spend a night being full again
It had been months and I was so tired of feeling empty.
Then I spent my hours in bars, in beds, in the streets.
Anywhere but with you.
Somehow I've turned the last 5 1/2 years into a list
A list of things you've taken from me
Your eyes are filled with a violent storm;
waves ready to pull my legs out from beneath me and drown
and I will not risk the shoreline of your face.
This morning you looked at me and I saw it.
It told me all I needed to know.
I've already sealed the doorway between you and my healing heart.
I hope for your sake that you can learn to stop knocking.
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ReplyDeleteYour poems are so deceptive. They appear as words but they are read as raw human emotions that are still bleeding. My heart aches for you when I read about your soul's pains. I cry knowing I can't be there to hold you and shush you and chase away your demons and fears. Be sure to hold that inner child and assure her she is strong enough to endure this loss just as she has done on every tragedy she has experienced before. Don't let her be alone, she deserves to be held, protected, and loved.
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