Body Love

Self-love. Body Acceptance. Fat Love. 

The first step to 100% acceptance of my body is to STOP JUDGING OTHER PEOPLE'S BODIES. Seems crazy, right? You would think it would be something that began and ended inside you, but it isn't. We need to stop looking at people as parts instead of a whole. If we view someone's body as being too much or too little in some way, we are not only pressing OUR body negativity on them, but we are also spending our energy comparing ourselves. This does not create a body positive atmosphere! All bodies are good bodies. All bodies are beautiful bodies.

 It's embarrassing to even admit that I DON'T already do this. I am secretly judgmental of myself and I am secretly judgmental of others. I have been raised in a World where "nobody's body is perfect." Now that I am a grown woman I am faced with so many different body views that it's got me dizzy. 

**People who use the words 'curvy' and 'thick' are just in denial about the fact that they are fat. Real woman have curves, not bones. Someone get that girl a cheeseburger! Women come in all shapes and sizes. I love my body but I wish I could have my fat disappear.**

I want to go into these phrases a little more. On an average day you will hear most of these things and more. All of these ideas are out there to show you how you, as a woman, should think of your body. These are all ideals that are not only accepted but celebrated, and I think it's time for a change. 

CURVY/THICK/BBW:

When it comes to your body, you choose the vernacular. The word 'curvy' may mean a number of things depending on who you ask. None of these words are a way to escape the reality of being fat. You know what else? FAT IS NOT A BAD WORD! We all have fat and many of us are fat. Being fat is the same as being tall or being blonde; it's just a fact. All of these words are words of empowerment; not of shame! These are all ways for us to embrace and love our bodies. These words have positive connotations. They turn what we see in ourselves into a description for the World. 

CURVES NOT BONES:

This is probably one of my least favorite phrases out there. You shouldn't need to put others down in order to boost your own confidence. THAT, my friends, is what we call bullying. Men love women. There's no science behind which body type will attract a man. You know what will? Confidence. Thin women, fit women, and androgynous women are constantly having curves shoved in their face. These women are being told that no man will want them, that they need to eat more, that their body type somehow makes them less of a woman. If this doesn't outrage you, IT SHOULD! We are all women and we are all beautiful. To be against another woman is nothing but detrimental to everything we work for. I urge you to stop passing this idea along of curves being superior over bones or muscles. Start passing on the word that self love of all degrees is not only welcomed, but admired. 

GET HER A CHEESEBURGER:

If telling a woman she needs to go on a diet is something you would frown at, you should be appalled when someone uses this phrase. Not only does this tell the woman that you don't like her body, it is also telling her that the way to improve on herself is to eat more. If you feel the need to say this to someone, chances are she either has a very fast metabolism or she works very hard for her body. If she has a naturally fast metabolism and you tell her she is too thin, you are encouraging her to dislike the functionality of her own body. Her body is sufficiently fueling her, helping her grow, AND keeping her from putting on a lot of weight. She should be in awe of her body, not ashamed of its ability to do its job. If she has worked for her body, you are throwing dirt on everything she has accomplished. She has found a lifestyle that fits her, pushed her body to its limits, and now she has to face you and your body shaming. STOP IT. 

I LOVE MY BODY BUT...

The first time I realized what I was really saying when I said "I would be perfectly okay with my body if I could just get lose my belly fat" I was ashamed of my words. It sounds like I am accepting 99% of my body and hating just one part. But, the reality is, if I 'magically' got rid of my belly fat, that body shame would materialize somewhere else. When you think these words, you are becoming an enemy to yourself. 'I love my body' should be a revelation! Treating your body as if there are exceptions to its beauty is painful. It's painful to you and it is painful to those around you. The more acceptable is it for someone to say 'I love my body but...' then the more women will use those same terms for themselves. I challenge you to start saying I LOVE MY BODY. Say it with pride and say it without tacking on anything else. It isn't vain to love your body.

WOMEN COME IN ALL SHAPES AND SIZES:

This is the best movement out there as far as promoting a body positive World. To try and define this idea of a 'real woman' is just an excuse to try and exclude women. All women are real women. The more you vocalize your support for everyone, the more people will come to terms with supporting themselves. If you want a body love movement, you have to get it started. People listen to your words far more than you think. 

TO CLARIFY: Promoting self-love is not the same thing as encouraging poor habits. The movement I support is not about being fat or being thin; it is about rocking what you've got. There is nothing but positivity in this movement. It does not exclude anyone and is not designed to shame anyone.